Here is one survivors thoughts on healing and denial:
- "The hardest thing for me to realize in working through the effects of rape after so many years was that time does not "heal all wounds".Time made matters worse because I believed time should have made things better, and it hadn't. So, as a consequence, I believed I was "sicker" than others. I believed my turmoil to be caused by a sickness inside of me, not a result of what was done TO me. Facing down the demon of rape was the last thing I wanted to attempt. It seemed much more logical and safe...and comfortable to just let it pass without acknowledging 'it' at all. So, I pretended it never happened...
- "The pain is temporary, but denial and its consequences are forever." When we tire of the consequences, and become willing to work diligently on the sexual abuse issues, we are then on the way to living our lives as survivors rather than victims.
- We know and believe in our hearts that we were innocent victims. We know that we didn’t control the abuse. We don’t have to convince anyone else of our innocence. We truly love our self; we believe our self and we treat our self with respect. We are not powerless anymore. Recovery is possible. We can bloom where we’re planted. What has happened is one part of our lives, only one part!
- Recovery is a process; eventually we will settle in acceptance. Until then, we must remember that patience is something that we give ourselves today, and that this too shall pass.
- As always, take what you like and leave the rest.